Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
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