Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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