If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
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