glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize