btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize