oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
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