Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
