do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
