Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
