i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize