you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize