Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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