Operation Purity has been aborted
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
you never un-have a 4some
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
