love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
