i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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