I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize