I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
ok first of all what the fuck
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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