This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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