let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
