yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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