you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
