i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
did i walk over a car last night?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
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