I'm really into asian looking animals
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
