I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
