Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
