Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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