this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
