Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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