we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Randomize