her vagine was all disorganized.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
