i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
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