Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
