is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Randomize