Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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