I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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