Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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