You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Randomize
