Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
