Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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