just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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