Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
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