yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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