i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
