I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I have fence marks all over my body
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
