Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
They took my balls.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
