I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
