well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
