i just google imaged poop.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
My dick has a subreddit
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize