Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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