Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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