If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
