is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
